Ireland are currently playing Bangladesh. Both sides have been categorised as “developing”, one is that top of the class kid that the bigger boys like to bully and the other is that kid who has received a few too many blows about the head with a shovel, but occasionally is capable of an amazing judo move.
For fun, try and look back at your school days, and sort yourself into one of these groups.
Unfortunately (well I am sort of half Irish) our boys in light green lost to the boys in dark green in the first ODI. Ireland had a game that can only be described as a “shocker”. They were rolled over for 185, which the Tigers chased down in fewer than forty overs and with eight wickets to spare.
The Irish have done slightly better in the second ODI, by containing Bangladesh to 246/8. Well, I say “contain”, I mean, “prevent a ravishing.” Their attack was let by Dave Langford-Smith – that’s right, he of The Ferret fame – who managed 3-43.
Sadly, there is no sign of the Bangladesh Bop, although neutrals are hoping for a “dance out” in the case of a tied game.
It is unfortunate that I have posted mid-way through the match, but as Ireland stand at 112/5, it seems as though defeat is returning to Irish shores faster than you can say “Irish stereotype.”
I could say something serious here. I could point out the huge grant that was allocated to the Irish after a hugely successful World Cup. I could mention the disappointment that followed. The abysmal county performances. The large debts that their administrators racked up. But I won’t mention any of this.
Instead I will say: Ah Jesus, t’is our boys that’s coming now. They’re the Jockey’s bollocks, to be sure.