Monday, June 23, 2008

How do deal with India

Obviously, these people have become a right pain in the neck. They’ve become the Russia of modern cricket. Pushing everyone around, and no one is really sure why. It’s as if they’ve got lots of nuclear bombs, or something.

First, they refuse to involve themselves in twenty20 cricket. Then some people think twenty20 is a good idea. The BCCI reverses its decision and attempts to cash in on twenty20 and sets about ruining the lives of anyone involved in the original “rebel” league.

The BCCI’s own “legitimate” league is a farcical, purely commercial affair that ignored its effects on any other country.

Following the “amazing success” of the IPL, a Champions League of between domestic champions from across the world is announced. As soon as it is publicised, the BCCI decide to remove the English, because some of their players thought that twenty20 was a good idea before they did.

Then, the BCCI unilaterally announced that the international players playing for their sides would remain in their Indian team, presumably, they will be forced to play against their own home side.

Now, all of this is fine. Where the line must be drawn is when they make you spend your entire day off queuing at the Indian Embassy in London.

These buggers must be stopped.

I reckon we should remove the Indian teams from the Champions League, except for perhaps the ICL sides, which should solve some of our player-overlap problem. Then we naturalise Geoff Boycott as an Indian citizen, and make sure he’s on the telly all the time. That’ll learn ‘em.

That'll learn 'em good.


mel said...

I read your post in the style of the fake orgasm scene from When Harry Met Sally. With every point you raised a moan of "Yes!" emerged from my lips, with your comments about Geoffrey Boycott bringing my reading to a satisfactory climax. And it's not every day you type Geoffrey Boycott and climax in the same sentence.

Spigot said...

I'm pretty similar to Mel as I'm female and stroppy and... oh no, I'm similar in that I really agree with not what you say but the way you say it, which is pretty chuffing rare for this place. They actually must be stopped.

They, as one of the four participants of this Champions Trophy bollocks somehow write the rules as they see fit, using the ICC as a total puppet to suit their needs.

Does anyone in the ICC resent this? Or do they all let it happily happen because they are 1) making loads of money and 2) the BCCI with hats on.

John said...

Please let us know if any of the bloggers here can help with the misery.

The Atheist said...

I'm glad my writing makes you feel orgasmic, Mel.

John, thanks for the offer. I've got my visa now. It only cost me £40 and knocked off decades of my life. A small price to pay in return for several exotic stomach conditions.

Ceci said...

Agree with all your wise words Aetheist, top notch, particularly as the future of cricket seems to be in the process of being decided by one man - oh two then if you count Stanford.