Should New Zealand exist?

I have given my advice to New Zealand’s Cricket Board, Embassy in London and Prime Minister. All of whom were too proud to take it. Now, their pigheadedness is reaping that which it sewed.

South Africa wiped New Zealand from the face of the planet, in a fashion that reminded the world of the Roman invasion of Dacia. In fact, an emergency session of the UN Security Council has been called to discuss a motion to rename New Zealand “New New Safferdom”.

To be honest, it was an embarrassing performance. With the Proteas doing as they promised, by obliterating the Black Cap’s batting line-up with an awesome display of aggressive bowling.

I used to like New Zealand. They are rather like Sri Lanka – small, plucky and occasionally good in a conspicuous un-Australian manner – that deserved a sort of absent minded, distant encouragement.

Then a Kiwi started commenting here. This required immediate New Zealand bashing. Eventually, he tired of arguing with me, and my relentless Kiwi-bating that he, and all his kin, never returned to this blog.

This means it’s safe to say I like them again. New Zealand, I like you. You deserve to exist. But please try to lose less. I get enough of that at home.