Wednesday, November 19, 2008

We’re back in business baby

Some of you may have noticed a drop in post frequency recently. To those that did, please consider yourselves a proud owner of a gold star. To those that didn’t, consider yourself official Enemies Of The Glorious AYALAC Peoples.

You see, I now have the internet at home again. This, of course, is excellent because, despite having internet access at work, and despite being paid less than my previous position, I am still manically busy and unable to blog at the office.

So! Now, a new era of AYALAC-rest of the world relations begins. Rejoicing breaks out. Women swoon. Parrots die.

Much has changed since we spoke last.

England lost the rugby. England lost the cricket once. And then once more. An Irish fellah bought an election in the New World. And England will probably lose the football tonight. So, as we can see, the world continues to move as normal.

It’s really great having internet at home. I listened to Today Programme for the first time in ages this morning. I was surprised at the amount of slang British English they used. Shocking, really. But, I was also buoyed by hearing the dulcet tones of Nick Griffin, leader of the British National Party, and also Nick Clegg, leader of some other party. I forget which.

So! Yes. Cricket.

Well, it’s the usual depressing stock for us Englanders. You know that things are bad when you see headlines end in the word “again”. However, to make a series point about actual cricket, I will say this:

For ages, the test side has shown that stability in selection has resulted in improved results. Of course, illness and injury can and have taken their toll, but overall, it seems that England do better when England know who England is. Yet, conversely, the ODI side has been all over the shop.

Pick a player here. Pick a player there. Stick him in as an opener. Pick a team with three batsman. Put him at eight. Kill all the spinners. It has been a progressive, morphing chaos for years now. So, it seems eminently sensible to me that now, the ECB has decided to draw the line and let the “current” team settle for a bit. Enough, say they, is enough.

And you know what? Bugger me, if I don’t agree with the England management. Heck, give them all medals, say I. Nay, OBEs!

To all this talk of “Bell and Prior aren’t working” and “drop Collingwood, pick Smode” and the “let’s drop him to 10 and promote him to 5” and all the rest of it, to this I say this: Stop it. Just leave them alone. It’s the best of all possible worlds. It’s time to start pretending that we’re New Zealand.

We’re not in Kansas any more.

We're in Berlin. Where we're about to launch an attack on allied German-English hooligans. Come on you rioters!

7 comments:

Jrod said...

You will never learn will you. Once you agreed with the English management they realised it was time they changed.

Bopara to open it is.

Anonymous said...

And where the fuck is Dangeranus? You come to India without Dangeranus?

You might as well lube your ass before you bend over.

Apologize for the profanity. These one-sided one-dayers are making me grumpy. I'd rather see a close loss than a thumping win.

Unknown said...

England lost the rugby? Surely the scrum was at least dominant over Australians, they can't scrummage for shíte..

Tell me more..

The Atheist said...

Bloody hell.

Bloody England.

That's going to be my new political slogan.

And I was well impressed by the Ozzie scrummaging the other day. Pansies no more.

Damith S. said...

Bell and Prior are not working cuz I dont think Bell is an ODI player.

The move to bring Bopara up the order is a fair call. He is a good player and can take advantage of the PPs.

Id love to see what Cook and Bopara can do though.

Mind swapping links buddy ?
http://www.theflyslip.net/

Miss Field said...

I'm stuck on the Nick Griffin thing. A joke?

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