Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Wales + cricket = The Rubbish

The last game in the one day series between Empirer and Empieree drizzled out to an abandoned draw.

Many of us would recall the abandoned draw as a familiar result to family holidays in Wales. You were stuffed into a clinging anorak, prodded up soggy mountains, dragged through depressing marshes and forced to commune with Welshies. The Rubbish was everywhere present.

Of course, the fellahs in the ECB ignored the hard-fought experiences of youth, and have repeatedly played matches in Wales. WHAT ARE THEY THINKING?

Can you remember a single holiday to Pembrokeshire or Gwyndathshire every classified as “won”?

Why don’t England play in the South of France or perhaps in the Italian hills? Those were all “won” holidays. You could bring some nice wine into the, err, ground. You could wax lyrical about the local cheese. Such grounds even offer chances to laugh at the silly locals’ English. Moreso than in Wales.

In stead, the ECB offers Welshy sog airy, pies and lager as watered down as the weather.

In other news, that Australia is messing everything up with his daft theories. This isn’t the first time it has happened.

But, I’m debating whether to go to see the potentially interesting Somerset vs. Notts match in Trent Bridge this Saturday. Only problem is, the train ticket is £50. And I’m not guaranteed any play or a West Country win.

Should I go?


captains-trousers said...

i'm going
so it must be a good idea
supporting somerset is always a good idea, since you can always celebrate with cider a go go on the long way home. or commiserate with a cider a go go on the long way home. frankly, it is a win win.

Jrod said...

You will get to see roboeyelids if you go

SixSixEight said...

What about saving up and going to Somerset v Durham at Taunton instead? Cider and a possible brace of Durham batting collapses???

Rob said...

£50, that is outrageous.

The Atheist said...

Damn tootin' Rob. It's a bugger.

I also realised that it takes four hours to get there.

I'm afraid I'm probably not going to go. Unless someone wants to lend me their helibopper?

Miss Field said...

Fifty pounds! And your country is so weeny. Bugger that for a joke!

I was wondering, how does it work with umbrellas? Because surely if you wanted to use your umbrella and so did the people on either side, surely not all three could be used (unless your choice of umbrella was a child's Harry Potter umbrella, like mine), and then one person would only be half covered and still get wet. I'd be cross, and odds are I'd be that person.

The Atheist said...

Don't worry all. I didn't go. I went into London to buy some shirts. I'm not sure why.

But, Miss Field. Umbrellas.

When you have an umbrella, you actually lose any form empathy. It's a well recorded scientific phenomenon where the metal in the brolly actually functions as a transistor for human “awareness of other people currents” sourcing them away from the person and up, through the shaft into the skies.

This is how people in the street are happily able to poke strangers in the eyes with their brollies.